Dishwashers

[Lazarus]

A man went to visit his 90-year-old Grandfather in
a secluded, rural area of the state. After spending the
night, his Grandfather prepared breakfast for him
consisting of eggs and bacon. He noticed a film-like
substance on his plate and he questioned his Grandfather.
"Are these plates clean?"
His Grandfather replied, "Those plates are as
clean as soap & water can get them so go on and finish
your meal."
That afternoon, while eating the hamburgers his
Grandfather made for lunch, he noticed tiny specks
around the edge of his plate, and a substance that
looked liked dried egg yokes.
So he asked again, "Are you sure these plates are
clean?" Without looking up from his hamburger, the
Grandfather says, "I told you before, those dishes are
as clean as soap & water can get them, now don't ask me
about it anymore!"
Later that afternoon, he was on his way out to get
dinner in a nearby town. As he was leaving,
Grandfather's dogs started to growl and would not let him
pass.
"Grandfather, your dogs won't let me out."
Without diverting his attention from the football
game he was watching, Grandfather shouted, "SOAP, WATER,
GET OUT OF THE WAY!"

[siggy]

Eewwwwww:spew:

[Lazarus]

My thoughts exactly. ;)
__________________________________________________

Joe buys a cute little filly that he plans on racing
next season, but when he gets her home, his old stallion
smells her and wants her, and starts kicking up dust.

Joe doesn't want her knocked up, because she won't be
able to race, so he calls the vet. The vet tells him to
tie a bed sheet around the filly's rump to keep the
stallion away.

So that day, Joe does just that. The next day, the
farmer goes out to the corral to make sure the vet's
solution worked, but the filly is nowhere to be found.
Joe follows her hoof trail to the neighbors farm, and
sees the neighbor's kid out by their barn.

"Hey, young man," Joe calls, "did you see a filly run by
with a bed sheet tied around her rump?"

The kid replies, "No, sir, but one dashed past here
early this morning with a handkerchief sticking out of
her ass!"

[siggy]

oppsie :rofl:

[Lazarus]

:D I thought it quite amusing too. ;)

[X-Calibur]

Originally posted by Lazarus

The kid replies, "No, sir, but one dashed past here
early this morning with a handkerchief sticking out of
her ass!"

OMG :rofl: :hic: :baa: :D :) :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

I'll wait till the laughting pain goes away before reading it again....

my stomach hurts!!!!!!!!1

[Lazarus]

Thankee X, you are too kind. :D